Where is true love?

People talk about love in different ways.. Different situations. There are so many movies about Love. Everyone needs love. But can you tell me where is this "True Love" ? or "Unconditional Love" ?

Love another soul for nothing! Not even love in return!
Lets talk about the Mother's love.

When a lady is pregnant, she makes a lot of sacrifices for the unborn kid. When the child comes out to see the world, the mother takes care of each and everything for the child from the time it takes it first breath! Once she is a mother, all her fuss about even feces is gone and she cleans up the kid. All her focus is now just the KID. She actually does not expect anything from the kid now. She just has a feeling that the kid should grow well. It should be healthy. It should be happy... She sacrifices - in fact forgets her happiness. There is no happiness for her on her own. The child's happiness is her happiness. She starts living through the child. Its a wonderful thing to experience for any woman.

There is no doubt that mothers love is TRUE UNCONDITIONAL love.
Its all great! Now, how long does this continue? What happens when the child grows and say, around 20yrs or so.. Does the mom's love still remains the same?

Actually, it depends on how the kid is. Now, its not just one side anymore. A mother is also a normal human being. Living with normal emotions, expectations, desires, anger and so on..
If the child is no longer caring for the mom. If it just thinks about its own self and goes around for its happiness, do you think the mom will still love the kid the same way as she loved 19 years back?

Definitely not. And dont be surprised that its my Mom who told me this! (I feel that she is an enlightened soul!)

As and when the child grows, the mom does not live through the child. A line of separation starts to appear. Because, the child has its own identity. Its different from its mom. Its unique. But still of course the love is there. But the 'unconditional' may not exist!
So, if the child loves the mom - if its understands the mom and respects her and gives her what she needs, at least recognizes and thanks the mom for what it gets from her it will all be good. Else, even this mom-child relation becomes a normal one-one relation. No special meaning. But of course, what ever happened 20 yrs back is still true. There was unconditional love. But just that, its not there anymore.

When the separate identity starts to appear, the universal rule comes into play - give and take! Only when the child loves the mom, the mom is going to love it back. And even if you are going to say that "No she loves the kid all the time", it can be because, "Its her child. Her product!".

This is some kind of bitter reality! Not many will agree with me. I know one person who will agree for sure - Its my Mom!! Who explained me this fact!

Its not the people around you!

Its the characters revolving around your life. Yes. What I mean is, you are not bound to people around you. Its just their characters.

First time when this thought came to me was when I left my home and stayed outside for 2 months. I felt that I dint miss my parents. Because, in one way or the other, I saw them in people around me. Of course, everyone is unique. They are their own. But still I could see glimpses of my Dad, my brother and my mom in people whom I met there. The way they think about some scenario just reminded me about my parents and bro.
And another thing is that, the same person may not react the same way all the time. But somehow, someone or the other would remind me of all those characteristics I have been living with.

Thats when I first discovered that its just the characters revolving around you. You are bound to face certain things, certain characteristics, certain way of thinking. And you face it where ever you go till the time you should face them.

I also felt that I cannot escape from such things. If I am going to escape from sarcasm of one guy, I am going to see it in another guy! Because, its just that I need to experience that feeling. So, if I just accept those in the first place, at least I can remain calm. Else, I try to find an escape - escape - escape again and again ultimately to find myself in agony!

Now I am living with just one person! And here I see all the characteristics of my Dad, mom, bro in him. May be that is not him. He is not like that all the time. He is not like that to others. But to me he is like that. Or at least I perceive like that. So it means just the same to me. Whatever may be the truth!

No point in blaming people or trying to escape from them. Just be calm and relaxed and face it. Accept it whether you like it or not. Just say to yourself, "may be there are so many things in me which they dont like!". After a while nothing will trouble you. You can just be your own self - with peace and calm!

Positive thinking

What exactly is being positive?

Cheating one's own self that everything - 'all people and their thoughts and activities' are all good?Assuming that everyone is thinking good? Assuming that everything is good? I dont think so..

Positive approach in life does not mean that all things/people are good. Which would mean that there is nothing called 'bad'. Well.. thats not the case. Positive approach essentially means thinking that 'everything happens for good'.

So, you actually know whether someone around you is thinking good for you or doing something bad for you. You actually have the discretion to differentiate between good and bad. And the positive approach makes you "not to worry" about bad things and just take only good things around you. Just believe that things are happening for your own goodness. And that no negativity can disrupt your happiness.

Boundaries of mind

Mind is capable of thinking anything. But why dont all human minds think everything?

Minds thinking ability is limited by one person's principles of life. For some, killing is a very big crime. His mind wont go to that point. For some, the mind will go to the extent of cutting one's body into pieces.
Say, if a child is brought up by saying things like "If you do this, you will be punished! God will come and punish you in sleep! etc etc", it develops some kind of fear for punishment. If the child's questions are unanswered, it will mostly stop ask questions. In these cases, the level of thinking is limited by fear or by boredom. It can be a variety of such external and internal factors.

Mind needs different things to get engaged. If you dont give it, it either can sink into boredom or it can also jump high to extreme thoughts.

So when does some extreme thoughts come? From my experience, extreme thinking comes to those who have enjoyed lot of freedom. Unobstructed thoughts, both constructive and destructive can come to such people who work by logical reasoning rather than just following some "laid-down" principles. Scientists and great discoverers and inventors are people who think beyond boundaries. Who have basically no boundaries for their thoughts. Thats how some new invention is taking place. "Something new"!
And extremists/terrorists are also like that. They also do not have boundaries in their thoughts. But their thoughts are destructive. it invents different new ways for attacking and destroying things!

So, for making the mind to do its best, it needs freedom! It becomes highly creative when given full freedom. But channelizing the minds energy into something constructive is the main point.

Being Lucky..

We say somebody is 'lucky', when we find that they have got something without exerting themselves as much as we do for the same..

But is it so? Are they really lucky in that sense?

Before I proceed, I have to say that I am strong believer in Fate and also the concept of multiple Births.
Its like, whatever we do, we have the energy of those activities around us. We will carry the results of our activity in our aura. This, we carry across our births. May be in one birth, a person struggles to find a right job. But he has not succeeded. In his next birth, the effects of those struggle and hard work will be there with him. He might get job easily without any struggle.. And we call him 'lucky'..

Also, at times, we get so frustrated that what ever we do, we do not see any results. I am sure, even in such cases, the effects of those efforts we take, will be with us - across births. If not now, may be later, may be in this birth or in the next, on one fine day when we never expect it, it will happen and surprise us. And that, I call Fate. Fate decides when to show the results.. For some, they get it immediately and for some, they do not. (May be this is what is being lucky!)

What ever we do - positive or negative, the effects are with us. Forever! And I think, this is how a person builds his Aura.. Also his 'Karma'!

Wonders of the world..

There are so many small wonders around us... It has become more common that we do not stop to say a "Wow!!".. More over, our schools have taught us the scientific facts behind them, so we say "Oh ya its like that because 2 + 2 always equals 4! Its quite natural"..

But seeing everything that we come across as a wonder makes life sooo happy.. It makes us to enjoy that moment of life..

For me, the most common miraculous thing in our daily life is Salt - Without salt we cant enjoy the food! When added to food, it miraculously changes the taste!! But we cant imagine eating it alone!

A small kid - Its a wonder! The very sight of a child makes you so happy.. You forget everything in a moment and start smiling.. Its so nice to see how it starts learning things.. how it struggles to balance and stand, how to tries to take its first step, how its trying to say something.. how it grows.. everything!
I duno why, but it makes me happy to think that even I was like that some time back and I grew up to this much big!!

And the next thing I would say is our brain - It has produced so many ideas to change the world! The imagination power, reasoning ability, creativity, planning, so many things packed in such a small stuff and that too inside our own body!
It created languages not only for men to communicate but also for man-machine to communicate! We cant see it (of course doctors can break through our skull and see it) but we are feeling it in everything we see in our life today.. The lights, train, cycle, computer, programs, table, chair and also my favorite Senseo coffee machine! I really wonder at that invention everyday!

Everything around and within us is a wonder.. And most of all our Brain is the greatest wonder bcoz, its able to see itself as a wonder!

World beyond peception..

After watching the movie Da Vinci Code, he asked me - so, what do feel about the movie? Can you find some learning point?
I said "yaa.. One thing I could see is there is always a world beyond our perception!".

We tend to limit our definition of world based on what we see. We draw some boundary and be happy within. Some have smaller and some have a bit larger! Not a big difference actually.. All of us tend to limit it!

One day you say something and the next day your opinion changes.. Someone says something and it is disproved some other day.. You perceive something in one angle, someone perceives it entirely differently.. He says Jesus had wife.. It surprised me when somebody told me Bharathiyar was on drugs and he wrote beautiful poems only after having drugs! Its soo hard to believe that Lord Krishna did so many things for the sake of Devas. So many things which can be seen as injustice to Rakshas.. It might be even more harder to see the actual meaning of what the Sivlingam means..
Our opinions get updated as we grow.. As our knowledge base grows.. Of course! Its only for those who are open to update their knowledge base.

There are people who are very happy within their world. They dont want to come out. They are not ready to see what reality says.. what is there. Their life is simple. But limited! You need to make a conscious decision on whether to be happy with limited knowledge or to spread across a vast expanse and just see what ever comes on the way!

So.. ultimately, your opinions change drastically from where it started. The more we become open, we can see more. We learn more. What for? Why should you learn? How is it going to change your life? May be we become open for accepting new things and respecting others.

Again it is the step towards learning more.. Where does it going to lead me? To the truth? To the Wisdom? Is a lifetime enough to find out the truth like this?

Our knowledge is limited! There is always something beyond our perception and knowledge..